Sunday, 24 January 2010

Blue Screen of Death

I was having a conversation with my housemate (the one who has a new found thing about going to Wales) and we were browsing Wikipedia, comparing today's modern wrestlers to the ones we remember as a child. We don't much watch it any more, because we're not 12. But his younger brother does, and I like to fondly remember my days of the WWE before it harvested anti-Arabian sentiment in a politically unstable climate and used it for entertainment.

But we think we have a fresh angle. A positive stereotype to reinforce. A young, Asian man...who is an I.T. technician. He will be called: The Blue Screen. He will dress in a smart pair of trousers and white shirt. Smart slick hair, bespectacled, pens in his top pocket. This guy looks like he's going to wipe your hard drive into a submission. In preparation for this new character, we have compiled a list of his specialist moves and techniques:

The Loading Screen: A submission move, very painful. Whilst in effect, he aggressively shouts PLEASE WAIT, LOADING IN PROGRESS at you.

Windows Crash: The Blue Screen drags an old monitor into the ring, and kicks your head into it.

DOS Dive: I dunno, some sort of flying maneouvre from the top rope.

Blue Screen of Death: A specialist clothesline, rendering you unconscious.

The Double Click: Some sort of double kick combo. These ideas are getting a bit half-formed now.

We've not yet decided what music he would enter to, but perhaps some sort of extended remix of the Intel Inside jingle. Or I liked the idea of the Tetris theme tune. Needless to say his video would begin with a lot of green, Matrix-style text scrolling across the screen followed by him looking very serious, installing new software onto your laptop and browsing for affordable replacement parts on Ebay. He naturally, comes from:,_Indiana

Though if that is not good enough, Silicon Valley would probably do.

Anyway, this has been enough procrastination for now. All further ideas for the character would be appreciated, and casting will begin shortly.

No comments:

Post a Comment